it wasn't lemon gatorade
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Just invented taco cereal.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.