Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi

  (214): View more from Texas

  ok, stay where you are, be there soon

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi (214): ok, stay where you are, be there soon http://tfl.nu/1y99
  Replies (55) Good night (2453) Bad night (699)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends http://tfl.nu/q0nl
  Replies (5) Good night (2489) Bad night (782)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): 69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle http://tfl.nu/56qq
  Replies (31) Good night (679) Bad night (6513)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (727): Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose? http://tfl.nu/qulw
  Replies (112) Good night (1139) Bad night (16068)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something http://tfl.nu/tuha
  Replies (24) Good night (3812) Bad night (946)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone. http://tfl.nu/mzb6
  Replies (7) Good night (1382) Bad night (2701)
• Favorite

  (807): View more from Ontario

  I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (807): I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature. http://tfl.nu/rbpc
  Replies (47) Good night (6446) Bad night (1102)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke. http://tfl.nu/ibe5
  Replies (11) Good night (911) Bad night (3913)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop. http://tfl.nu/2w6b
  Replies (14) Good night (2848) Bad night (1008)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something. http://tfl.nu/60sr
  Replies (7) Good night (2101) Bad night (1252)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Whatever you gave me is making me lactate

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): Whatever you gave me is making me lactate http://tfl.nu/rku9
  Replies (8) Good night (744) Bad night (2764)
• Favorite

  (469): View more from Texas

  Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (469): Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS. http://tfl.nu/dcv0
  Replies (3) Good night (1454) Bad night (403)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  I just really need a hug and a shower beer

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): I just really need a hug and a shower beer http://tfl.nu/4ssr
  Replies (5) Good night (835) Bad night (563)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire... http://tfl.nu/4kfh
  Replies (2) Good night (214) Bad night (403)
• Favorite

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (778): And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again. http://tfl.nu/11c3
  Replies (2) Good night (703) Bad night (113)

Randomize