Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."