I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Randomize
