if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
