Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
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