Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
23 Absolutely Despicable Things That People Have Actually Done
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno