Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions