he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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