maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter