ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Nicole vs. Life
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize