i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
