My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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