Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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