Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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