I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
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Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
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I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.