Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
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