he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize