Small penises have feelings too.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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