Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize