K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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