Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
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