we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
