What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
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