I wanna passion pit in your ass
im six kinds of drunk right now
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Randomize
