We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
