Jerry, you need to find god
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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