He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize