I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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