I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize