she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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