Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.