Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?