i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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