Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
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