I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Couch. On fire.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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