Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
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