To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Randomize