I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
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I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
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Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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