You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
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Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
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I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
COCAINE IS GR8
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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