doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Randomize
