Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
