I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize