let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
