Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(847): View more from Illinois

I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting

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(847): I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting http://tfl.nu/4np3

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(440): View more from Ohio

just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.

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(440): just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy. http://tfl.nu/sv1q

Replies (15) Good night (841) Bad night (2206)
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(718): View more from New York

Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."

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(718): Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom." http://tfl.nu/h2e6

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(260): View more from Indiana

I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.

(260): View more from Indiana

Sorry- wrong number! :)

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(260): I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier. (260): Sorry- wrong number! :) http://tfl.nu/1604

Replies (18) Good night (1381) Bad night (4780)
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(425): View more from Washington

the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.

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(425): the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem. http://tfl.nu/jjmu

Replies (45) Good night (2301) Bad night (6825) Order T-Shirt
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(816): View more from Missouri

Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.

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(816): Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower. http://tfl.nu/cq6t

Replies (41) Good night (1340) Bad night (13178) Order T-Shirt
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(207): View more from Maine

I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?

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(207): I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar? http://tfl.nu/a7cq

Replies (37) Good night (6848) Bad night (951) Order T-Shirt
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(310): View more from California

So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?

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(310): So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned? http://tfl.nu/6bz7

Replies (15) Good night (5084) Bad night (898) Order T-Shirt
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(212): View more from New York

we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy

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(212): we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy http://tfl.nu/2r3y

Replies (6) Good night (2576) Bad night (1390) Order T-Shirt
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.

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(617): She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her. http://tfl.nu/sdzd

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(712): View more from Iowa

You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.

(712): View more from Iowa

On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.

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(712): You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled. (712): On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride. http://tfl.nu/7lij

Replies (2) Good night (2007) Bad night (972)
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(503): View more from Oregon

All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.

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(503): All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over. http://tfl.nu/hufa

Replies (21) Good night (2561) Bad night (1005) Order T-Shirt
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(262): View more from Wisconsin

Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.

(262): View more from Wisconsin

I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.

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(262): Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward. (262): I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win. http://tfl.nu/2vvo

Replies (18) Good night (623) Bad night (1583)
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(210): View more from Texas

Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.

(682): View more from Texas

Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.

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(210): Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that. (682): Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude. http://tfl.nu/g9al

Replies (2) Good night (461) Bad night (761)
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(949): View more from California

YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!

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(949): YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER! http://tfl.nu/b6lu

Replies (3) Good night (375) Bad night (259) Order T-Shirt

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