We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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