I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!