hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize