Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (319): View more from Iowa

  Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (319): Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts http://tfl.nu/snvl
  Replies (51) Good night (5141) Bad night (983)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick http://tfl.nu/awtp
  Replies (16) Good night (2976) Bad night (734)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (207): do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam? http://tfl.nu/5qkv
  Replies (31) Good night (945) Bad night (5493)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (706): Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line. http://tfl.nu/zp2p
  Replies (15) Good night (1235) Bad night (4397)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (803): we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper http://tfl.nu/mqbh
  Replies (13) Good night (5776) Bad night (2163)
• Favorite

  (319): View more from Iowa

  should my penis look like a turkey

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (319): should my penis look like a turkey http://tfl.nu/u56w
  Replies (18) Good night (918) Bad night (5358)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (707): You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip" http://tfl.nu/cn9w
  Replies (6) Good night (3587) Bad night (1167)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (216): There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us. http://tfl.nu/2y42
  Replies (4) Good night (1738) Bad night (718)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets. http://tfl.nu/4kdw
  Replies (11) Good night (839) Bad night (2937)
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (972): I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in. http://tfl.nu/6wlf
  Replies (16) Good night (1024) Bad night (1919)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack. http://tfl.nu/15rr
  Replies (6) Good night (1665) Bad night (504)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket http://tfl.nu/ka4g
  Replies (5) Good night (578) Bad night (1390)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck. http://tfl.nu/mycr
  Replies (9) Good night (2152) Bad night (669)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  You burned the hair off your arms. Again.

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  It grows back stronger each time.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): You burned the hair off your arms. Again. (860): It grows back stronger each time. http://tfl.nu/ybhf
  Replies (1) Good night (848) Bad night (498)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success http://tfl.nu/tn2h
  Replies (0) Good night (337) Bad night (157)

Randomize