jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize