I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Randomize