Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
